CD 13

Today I am sad.  Not bummed out, not pissed cuz I had a bad day, not tired, just irrationally sad.  I kind of feel like I want to cry at odd times.  Today I sort of feel like I did when I had my BCP patch that made me go hormonal and suicidal...no, you don't have to worry, I'm not suicidal...lol...but it's just that weird 'pit in your stomach', almost like a grief kinda of sad.  I guess it would be the feeling I associate with my middle school years (when I actually [i]was[/i] suicidal) showing up for a 6-hour visit.  I was fine at work with the kids.  I was even fine at work until 6 working at my desk.  Then I got in the car, and it was right there in my face.

My coworker, the one that's pregnant, who also happens to be the one that had been being a bitch to me earlier this year but has made a 180 turn and didn't realize I was having issues while watching her get bigger and bigger and now feels really bad, asked me today how my ovulating was going.  Odd lunch conversation, but I thought it was really nice of her to ask.  I told her since my last cycle was 72 days, I hadn't the faintest idea.  This was over chocolate cake. 

Perhaps I should go eat some chocolate...that might cheer me up.  I know it is definitely NOT on the IR diet...but I think dark chocolate doesn't count.  At least, according to the PCOS Workbook, it doesn't, so I'll go by that.

Please be nice to me...it's day 13, and no sign of ovulation in site.  At least last cycle I had all the markings that I might be gearing up to ovulate...none yet.  I want my DCI to make me ovulate EVERY CYCLE on day 14.  I think I'm asking too much.